Oh, man. I just learned that my fake LifeSavers ARE available in my easy-access grocery store.
Look out, world.
These little suckers are fabulous. They’re not WintOgreen by any stretch of the imagination, but, like the Chachas sub for M&Ms, they’re pretty fantastic at what they do.
I learned of these little guys in Kuala Lumpur, where I was shopping for some going-home-on-the- airplane-snack and got a glimpse of a little green rolled candy package that said “Peppermint” in small print. Cheap, too. I think there, they were maybe .35 or something like that.
Sold. Several packs, in fact. But not enough. I ate what I’d bought on the way to the airport and regretted not buying out the lot.
I never noticed them in Jakarta before, not that I meander much in the candy aisle. I mean, I found the Chachas, so I figured it’d be all downhill from there.
But when I went back to Kuala Lumpur, I went to the same 7-11 to clear them out and they DIDN’T HAVE ANY. Devastated, I was.
But on the side trip to Cameron Highlands, I got a fix. In the two days I was there, I probably bought five packages. They’re addicting little suckers.
And amazingly, when I went to a much nicer grocery store back home than mine, I found them. I cleaned them out – seven packs, IIRC, and found out that here, they’re about .15 a package. To me, that is a bargain.
The mints themselves are noticeably smaller than LifeSavers, but I’m not holding that against them. I just eat more.
Still, that store is a ways away. (Holy smokes, try saying that five times fast!) I figured it’d be a nice treat once in a while and give me a little incentive (other than alfredo sauce) to hit the expat grocery store.
Incentives don’t really work for me, though, especially in the rainy season. It’s pouring outside for the third time today, for example. I’m not sure that empty caloric intake, even if it’s pepperminty, is worth getting caught in a monsoon. (Or lugging the bag containing an umbrella, boots and a poncho just in case it rains.)
So I was overjoyed when I found a second supplier, even if is the hated Walmarty store. That place, oddly enough, charges more for the little guys than the expat store, plus, well, it’s Walmarty – with all that entails. I’m avoiding that like tuberculosis.
Still, though, it was a source, so the few times I’ve had occasion to head that way (such as on my way back from the doctor, which I’ve done twice lately), I’ve gone in and bought no fewer than five packages.
Right now, I’m wrapped up in the chiropractor, though, and hope I am done with the doctor, at least for now. And, with no time off lately – this week was about what I expected, except I came down with a rotten cold to boot – I haven’t had the motivation to head out there.
Next week, I have two days off in a row (assuming I’m not asked again to cough one up, which I don’t think will happen), so I’ve been counting on getting another hit. Um, I mean, some more mints. Yeah, that’s right. More mints. I can stop any time I want.
So on the usual grocery-shopping day, I went to the usual grocery store. It’s Giant, and it’s in the bottom of this cut-rate mall (owned by the conglomerate, I believe). My door-to-door time is less than the play time of “Clancy’s Tavern,” but, as I learned today, a bit longer than “Honkeytonk University.” Longer by two playings of “I Didn’t Come Here and I’m Not Leaving,” in case you needed to know.
Anyway, it seems like everyone and their brother decided to hit the store between two of the three downpours we had today, but I still made good time. I swear, I buy very little, but if I forgot one thing, I’d be totally screwed for the week. Walking out without eggs, bread or an onion (which I’ve done before) would do me in.
Today, I learned two important things.
One, all the good carrots are gone in the afternoon. That’s worth remembering, even if there was little I could do about it today.
Second, and I bet anyone can guess, is that my little mints ARE available at Giant. I have a supplier! I am as thrilled as I was to learn about that blueberry or strawberry flavored milk I drink like liquid crack. (Also available: mango, orange … they are all fabulous.)
Honestly, I have paced the candy aisle twice before, trying to find Polos. I mean, at first, I thought they were Malaysian and not available, then I thought they were some exclusive treat here, so it didn’t occur to me to look all that hard, like outside the candy aisle. But when I found them at Walmarty Store, I made a point to check. And came up empty.
When I pulled into a checkout line (which, oddly, went really fast – I got behind an Indian family with about six people but few items. It was deceptively long because of all the people but all those other schmucks trying to find a line didn’t figure out that they were all together. Two points!) I happened to glance over at the point-of-purchase crap, which usually consists of these cough drop things called Strepsils, which I have an affinity for; some blueberry gum, which sounds disgusting; batteries and other assorted stuff, plus Cokes. And there sat two boxes of Polos!
I moved faster than a junkie who’d spied a DEA agent, only toward the boxes. Grabbed five, thought, “Gee, who am I kidding?” and went back for two more. Never even saw a price tag, but they turned out to be cheaper than they are at either of the two Jakarta places I’ve seen them. My grocery store rocks.
I should have bought both boxes. I’ve already eaten two packages and there is absolutely no way the other five are going to last me until next Saturday.
Good thing I’ve already located a dentist. Inchallah, this supply won’t dry up like Hank Hill’s “bait” did, but in the meantime, I foresee me some serious pepperminty times ahead.
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