The heat is on: perfecting popcorn

My apartment is fantastic. Granted, right now, my kitchen ceiling is dripping, but that’s because the apartment above mine has a leak in the dishwasher; it’ll get fixed. But in general, I really love my apartment, and the kitchen is wonderful. It’s got a fridge and a giant freezer. This is because of our frequent power outages, I think, or maybe because stuff isn’t available all year so you’re encouraged to buy a lot when you find whatever it is you want.

Sad cookop results

Friday, I bought a little convection oven-type thing. It’s not a legit high-end appliance, but it will come on with the generator, which is a step above the oven that came with the apartment. Like the air conditioning, that oven isn’t on the generator, so now I can make toast no matter what. The downside to the stove is that the cooktop isn’t especially hot.

I also have a hotplate that works with the generator and while it’s marginally hotter than the cooktop, my early efforts to make popcorn proved unsuccessful. And by that I mean really, really bleak. I cook popcorn on the stovetop, using just a little bit of oil and then adding, post-pop, a lot of spices. Salt, black pepper, cayenne pepper, onion powder, garlic powder, Tony’s or Slap … it’s addicting. And it’s a pretty quick and easy after school snack that’s really not bad for you.

But man, my cooktop. I tend to use a small fist of popcorn kernels, which makes about one overflowing bowl with just a few unpopped kernels, but this cooktop just doesn’t get hot enough. My tea-making has also been less than stellar, but at least tea you can steep. Popcorn, not so much.

My microwave also operates on a generator so I sought out a way to nuke the kernels. Although I had never tried it, I’d heard of it. Unfortunately, my understanding had been that it involved using paper lunch sacks, and not only have no source for those but I also have no interest in contributing to the trash piles here. Recycling is not a thing, though I do my best.

So dadgum easy

An internet search for directions yielded the site “Downshiftology,”which suggested that not only was microwave popcorn doable, it was doable in other ways that didn’t included trashing the environment. One suggested way was to toss kernel into a glass bowl and put a plate on top of it. It was such a simple method it seemed like something I should have thought of on my own, but why would I? I don’t own glass bowls!

Suggestion No. 3, and the Downshifter glossed right over this, was to use a “stasher” bag. Anyone heard of that? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Yeah, me neither, but, after doing an image search, I discovered I had a useable one. It’s just a silicone baggie. I had no idea there was a proper name. I thought “silicone baggie” was the proper name.

Mmm...pop

And ya know what? It works! It’s ridiculously easy to put in a little oil (which is optional but I do it), a small fist full of kernels and hit “add 30 seconds” four times on the microwave. I’ve yet to figure out how to work the microwave any other way, and it works.

The cleanup is easier, too, because, although the silicone baggie gets super, super hot, it doesn’t sizzle when I throw it in the sink. Or when the leaky ceiling drips on it.

Sometimes it’s the little things. Popcorn is a real thing here. Last week we had a Christmas party and I manned the popcorn table. We ran out from time to time, and the line just stacked up and the people waited patiently – no one wanted to miss out on the popcorn.

I will freely acknowledge the goofiness of a popcorn cooking method changing my snacking ways but it’s a great snack. It might not be a game-changer, but I just cannot get over how easy it was.